If You’re Single, You’re Gonna Die

Just kidding.

Now, since you’re here… Let’s do some real talk. If you’re single, raise your hand. Now take a long, deep breath, and exhale. Feel that? Everything is going to be okay, you’re not gonna die… Unless you text and drive.

I know Christmas and the holidays are here, and everyone and their little sibling seems to have a significant other, who they’re posting pictures with on Instagram. But you? Why have you been celebrating SAD (Singles Awareness Day) since Valentine’s Day of… 2000 something? It’s because you’re terribly unloveable and have nothing beneficial to share with anyone, and your fashion sense is really frumpy, right…?

NOOOO! Stop being so emo and start believing in your dang self! Listen, I get it. It sucks to be single when you don’t want to be. There was a period in my life after my first year of college, when (aside from several awkward dates and that one time I was trying to discern a vocation to priesthood), I was single. This period was a DECADE long. 10 Years. 120 Months. 43,800 Days.

During this time I could have crumpled up into the corner of my existence, in fetal position, and cried myself to sleep while I fed myself Bon Bon’s ALLLL BYYYY MYYYYSELLLLLLF (insert Celine Dion’s voice here). But I didn’t, because that’s dumb. Not so much the Bon Bon’s part, but the other part.

Now the purpose of this entry isn’t to give you 10 ways to ask someone out, nor to simply say you must die a martyrdom of Facebook relationship status: Single. But rather: Make the Most Out of Being Single.

That’s right: Make the most out of being single.

It’s a really important time in your life. It’s so crucial in fact, that it will significantly impact your future “everything”. 100 percent of the time, your future will be influenced in some way by your past. Haven’t you seen The Notebook? I haven’t. Anyways, use today well.

I don’t presume to know God’s will for your life, future, and destiny; but I do know He doesn’t want you to wallow in self-pity and static depreciation. Rather than seeing your situation in the negative, or in the glass-half-empty-forever position; see it as a golden opportunity to grow as a human being: In mind, body, and soul. The more you work on “you” now, the better off your future spouse and ultimately your marriage and vocation will be, because of it. So the challenge I present to you today is simple:

Make one tangible goal for yourself this week for each category of:

1. Mind
2. Body
3. Soul.

Then do it. Because if all we do is read fancy articles on how to improve our life, but don’t carry out any of the actual advice, it’s just like wasting time on the internet… Oh wait. Ha. I’m even going to help you out with some ideas to get started… Even before the New Year’s Resolution madness ball drops. Pick one from each. Repeat.

1. Mind:

– Read a book that you can benefit from
– Try “The Five Love Languages” by Chapman
– Or “The Temperament God Gave You” by Bennett
– Or “Wild At Heart” by Eldredge
– But don’t take my word for it haha #readingrainbow
– Grow in self-awareness
– Meet a counselor to deal with unresolved issues
– Learn a new skill / trade
– Get out of debt / Don’t go into debt (DaveRamsey.com)
– Enroll in a class
– Learn how to play an instrument (you can even learn for free on YouTube)
– Don’t feed negative or hopeless thoughts, they’re a waste of energy
– Turn off Netflix and do something above on this list

2. Body:

– Exercise
– Get to the Gym
– Join Crossfit and get ripped
– Eat healthier, but learn to enjoy junk on occasion
– Join an intramural league
– Learn a martial art
– Kick a bank robber in the face
– Go volunteer
– Go out of your way to buy food for a homeless person
– Go do a random act of kindness

3. Soul:

– Read the Bible 5 minutes a day, start with the Gospels
– The book of Tobit in the Old Testament is amazing by the way, because it’s about God answering the prayers of single people
– Frequent the Sacraments
– Make a Good Confession and let God forgive you, of everything
– Forgive the people who have hurt you, and learn to let go
– Pray the Rosary
– Go to Mass every Sunday, and scare the old ladies by even going on a weekday: MassTimes.org
– Join a youth / young adult group
– Make good friends, because friends will either make or break you
– Work on your relationship with Jesus, because it’s the most important relationship you’ll have. He loves you by the way, more than you could ever know.

If you’re reading this, I’m praying for you. Young adulthood is not always easy. But it’s all worth it, and God is faithful. I’ve seen it in my own life, even in the midst of loneliness, waiting, and longing.

“I know well the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11